A great deal of emphasis is placed on the Olympics for any athlete.
It’s the ultimate dream. The pinnacle of achievement in your craft.
I fell short this time. The deadline to qualify was the 25th of June. And I didn’t even get close.
Injury, lack of competition opportunity, not performing when the opportunity arose, and lack of competitors due to border restrictions. And then there was this pandemic that occured. It was a dud run to glory.
In the most recent competition, I was in a good headspace. Not because I believed I could qualify (I did), but because I found peace with any outcome. Good or bad. I knew what I had to do to qualify, and was aware that everything had to go right for this to occur.
Unfortunately, everything that could go wrong went wrong. Questionable hurdles performance, dud high jump run up, average Shot Put, -2.6 headwinds in the 200m then illegal +4.7m tailwinds in the Long Jump. There were only 3 Open Heptathletes in the competition including myself, and 2 dropped out with injury (1 at the beginning and the other on day 2). Thankfully, both were willing to start in each event to ensure whatever score I could do would count, unfortunately, a huge illegal tailwind in the long Jump (+4.7) meant no matter what performance I did, nothing would count as a qualifier towards the Olympics or Commonwealth Games. So I dropped out after the Long Jump on day 2.
Another contributing factor to dropping out was the pain in my right foot after Long Jump on day 2 (it’s been a niggling but manageable pain for 2-3 years). It was sore, very sore. But I am used to pushing through pain so I was prepared to continue on. However considering my score wouldn’t count towards a qualifier for the Olympics or the 2022 Commonwealth Games due to illegal Long Jump tailwinds, my Coach, Physio and I decided to withdraw from the competition.
Everything seemed like a total failure. But I wasn’t overly devastated because the circumstance was out of my hands.
Post competition MRI and CT scans revealed a Navicular Stress Fracture. This means 12 weeks off running, 4 weeks in a boot. Navicular Stress Fractures take a while to heal due to limit blood supply to the area.
So now, it’s 2 weeks since. I am here, in my room, with a boot, Bethel Worship Music playing, and waiting for dinner to cook whilst I put into words what in the freaking heck happened that lead to this very moment of me typing this post on my computer.
There is a twinge of distaste reflecting on how my Olympic endeavour unfolded. But honestly, I am grateful. I feel light. I need a break.
If anything, I did give everything I had to give and it wasn’t enough. And I am okay with that. Finally, I have time to heal. Something I haven’t given my body a chance to do.
On paper, I haven’t hit what I want for objectively measured athletics performance. I am satisfied with the work I put in, lessons learned and progress I have made on and off the track.
I am taking this rest and healing time seriously. I know all things work for good.
I ALWAYS bounce back better. And considering the magnitude of this situation, I know what is to come is going to be bliss. And I rest in that hope.
In God’s timing, I trust.
Too often I have fallen short trying to manipulate timing and situations for what I think I want.
But what I truly want is peace. To live from a state that is influenced by what’s within not from the external circumstance.
So here I now rest. And patiently wait for the tree that has been planted to bear fruit. In its right season.
2020 / 2021. Thank you.